Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Let Bygones be Bygones

It's true what they say: some things are better left in the past. This post contains 2 un-recommendations. And could contain more, but hopefully I'll learn my lesson.

The main motif? Trying to recreate the past. Case in point: the new Indiana Jones movie: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

I loved the first 3 movies. But after watching the fourth today, I regret it. It has sullied the memory of those 3 great movies. This movie takes the formula of the first 3 (paranormal artifact, plenty of bad guys, chases, traps, wry humor, whip action, fist fights... did I forget anything) and empties it from tongue-in-cheek humor, suspense, excitement and lets admit it, plot.

The latest film looks like it was written by someone (anyone) who saw the first 3 movies and said "hey, I can write one too!". Even taking into account that this is a fantasy movie, some of the things that happen here (don't worry, no spoilers here) are beyond imagination.

Harrison Ford, at 73, jumps and runs like a 17 years-old. He lacks enthusiasm when delivering his lines. Seriously, at one point in the film he looked bored. In another, his moth was delivering his one-liner, but his eyes were saying "the things I do for money..."

Shia LeBouf comes across as too snarky and one dimensional. Kate Blanchett, as the antagonist, is even less than one dimensional, if possible. And the plot... suffice it to say, I now feel I should have left in the middle.

But the waste of time and money is not the issue here. It's the memory that has been sullied.
Some movies don't need sequels. Not because they were bad - but because they were too good.

Case 2: MacGyver.

As a kid, I adored this show. The smart agent who solves every case without weapons, with just a gum wrapper, a banana and some detergent excited me to no end. I used to escape school to watch the episodes (which were shown on the Lebanese channel in English only - no subtitles, thus forcing me to master English faster).

Having missed it so much, I got the first season to re-watch it. I stopped after 3-4 episodes. I just couldn't believe the low-grade acting, the zero-grade "special effects" and the non-existing plot lines.

I got an even worse shock when I tried to watch old episodes of the Six Million Dollar Man. Lee Majors couldn't act even to save his life. And the corny slow-mo sequences are.. well... corny.

Bottom line: if you remember something as being good as a kid - cherish the memory, but don't act on it. Chances are it's not as good as you remember it was...

1 comment:

Ohads said...

you forgot bugs (and plenty of them - just like microsoft softwares).

I actually enjoyed indiana 4 (even though its flaws , it's stupid nad unrealistic plot and the fact that it looks like it was made in the 80's.)

Once in a while everyone needs to let his stupid side go out (yes i know , Guy , there is no shred of stupidy in you. So just hire one before you go to see a suspected to be stupid movie)